Monday, December 09, 2013

Merry Xmas

I know it's annoying to many people but I am even more resolved to write "Christmas" as "Xmas."

Yes, I celebrate Christmas. And, no, I'm not trying to annoy purists. Nor am I trying to take "Christ" out of "Christmas." In fact, I'm trying to do the opposite. 

I want to remind people that Christmas without Christ is just a sentimental mess. But, when I say Christ, I mean Jesus Christ who died on the cross. 

No cross.
No Christmas.

Because if there's no cross, there's no Christmas. If Jesus Christ doesn't die for our sins, we aren't celebrating Christmas--not even the shallow, Americanized version. Because there's no hope. Only death and despair.

So why do I insist on "Xmas"? Because that big, fat X is a cross to me. That's what it reminds me of. 

So while it used to bother me when others abbreviated Christmas this way, I am no longer bothered. Because it reminds me about the cross of the Christ-child. And it gives me a ready reason to humbly point it out to others. Ultimately, I want to point people to the Jesus of the cross and resurrection, and make much of the baby born to die...for me.

So, Merry Xmas! 

Wednesday, December 04, 2013

Church Health Trumps Church Growth

"Their responsibility (leaders listed in v. 11) is to equip God's people to do his work and build up the church, the body of Christ." Apostle Paul, Ephesians 4:12 NLT

Paul is teaching on the nature of the Church here in Ephesians. In particular, he's writing about what the gifted leaders of the Church should be doing with their spiritual gifts. (listed in v. 11)

What are they supposed to be doing? Building up the church (lit. "body"). Rick Warren says, a healthy church is a church that will grow. Church health trumps church growth. (Purpose-Driven Church)

Paul seems to be saying the same thing here. We equip the church family to mature in Christ. The result is that they will become more and more like Christ towards each other and towards a lost world. Inherent in this is making disciples who make disciples. But also inherent is growing in spiritual maturity is bearing the fruit of the Spirit more and more.

We in the Church focus a lot on growing our local church numerically. I submit that we should spend more thought and effort on growing our church family in the likeness of Christ Jesus. The result can't help but be a loving church that is also growing numerically.

Pray: Lord, help us as church leaders focus less on how to get people in the doors and more on how to lead those already with us to maturity in Christ. In Jesus' name we pray, amen.

Tuesday, November 26, 2013

Castles, Lords and Stewardship

Great article by Dave Ramsey I want to share with you. Darien

When many church members hear the word "stewardship," one idea pops into their minds: capital campaigns.

They think about building projects and fundraisers. They can't help it. That's how stewardship has been defined in churches for years. It's become part of our Christian culture.

But stewardship—and being a steward—really isn't a Christian idea at all. It's actually an old concept drawn from the days of castles and realms and the people who ran them. In those days (think Braveheart), people lived in realms—areas of land approximately the size of three counties today. In the middle of that realm was a castle, where the lord of the realm lived.

Now, the lord owned everything in the realm. He owned all the land, all the farms, all the buildings, and all the commerce. Everything was under his control and authority.

Of course, the lord's castle was the nicest home in the realm, but another house nearby was pretty nice as well. That's where the lord's steward lived. The steward didn't own anything, but he took care of everything that belonged to the lord. He managed the crop rotations, the labor force, the taxes, the banking, the commerce and all of the lord's other interests.

That's what stewardship was all about: asset management. So, in the early 1600s when the translators of the King James Bible needed a word to describe how God wants believers to handle money, the idea of stewards and stewardship was a natural fit.

God is the Lord. Psalm 24:1 says, "The earth is the LORD's, and the fullness thereof." He owns it all. And we are responsible to manage His stuff for His glory. That makes us stewards—ormanagers—of His resources. And just like the English lord held the steward responsible for his stewardship, 1 Corinthians 4:2 says we are going to give an account of how we manage God's resources.

As believers, we can't disconnect the ideas of ownership and stewardship. When we understand our responsibility as asset managers, we can gratefully receive what God passes to us and enjoy what He has entrusted to us. But if we start thinking of ourselves as owners, it becomes much harder for us to open our hands (and our hearts) to use His money for His purposes.

If we're going to reclaim the biblical definition of stewardship in the church, we've got to make sure believers understand the facts about God's ownership and our stewardship. We've got to help Christians embrace a paradigm shift that changes their thinking across the board in this area of life.

We've got to help them stop thinking like owners and start acting like managers.

You can find this article and other great stewardship resources at StewardshipCentral.org.

Also, check out DaveRamsey.com for other great resources on money management and details on the Dave Ramsey Show.

Wednesday, November 13, 2013

Big Questions

Big Questions

Why do bad things happen to good people?
Does God hear my prayers?
If God is all-powerful and all-good, why is there evil in the world?

Questions like these are common and legitimate. When I am wrestling with difficult questions like these, it serves me well to remember what God is like. 

The prophet Jonah confessed several things about God in his short book in the Bible. They are found in 3 verses (1:9, 2:9 & 4:2) which I'll briefly breakdown here.

Confession 1:

"(Jonah) answered, 'I am a Hebrew and I worship the Lord, the God of heaven, who made the sea and the dry land.'” Jonah 1:9, NIV

"the LORD"

Jonah rather smugly announces to the crew of his charter that he is one of God's chosen ("Hebrew", Jew) people and that he worships the LORD God. That would refer to the one who freed the Jews from the superpower Egypt back in the day and was responsible for so many more miracles. So almighty God is in view here as well as a personal God (YHWH aka Jehovah). God is all-powerful. God is personal.

"the God of heaven"

For those who think about life and death, this is the trump card. He's the God of eternity. So when you die, this is who you get to meet personally. He doesn't just reside in heaven--he created it from nothing.

"who made the sea and the dry land."

This God of mine, well, he's the Creator. He created it all--sea and land. I imagine the "sea" part was particularly important to these sailors who were frightened for their lives at this point in the story.

Confession 2:

"...I will say, ‘Salvation comes from the Lord.” (Jonah 2:9, NIV)

"Salvation comes from the LORD"

Salvation from what, you ask? From death, hell and the wrath of God. One day we'll die. When that day comes, we'll face our Creator. What will he say? Do? He'll confront us about sin and what we did with his Son, Jesus the Christ.

God is just because God is holy. Therefore, he must punish sin. 

However, God is also love. And a loving God is merciful. He doesn't want us to receive his just wrath. He sent his one and only son, Jesus, to die on the cross to take our wrath for us. When we trust in him and his work on the cross, God sees his righteousness on us and forgives us. He sees us as if we'd never sinned. Amazing grace. God is holy and just. God is merciful. God forgives. God saves.

Confession 3:

He prayed to the Lord, “Isn’t this what I said, Lord, when I was still at home? That is what I tried to forestall by fleeing to Tarshish. I knew that you are a gracious and compassionate God, slow to anger and abounding in love, a God who relents from sending calamity.

"gracious and compassionate"

God is full of grace and full of mercy. Justice is getting what you deserve (like that speeding ticket). Grace is getting what you don't deserve (a warning instead of a ticket). Mercy is not getting what you deserve (not getting the ticket you deserved). 

God is full of grace and full of mercy. This starts at life and death. It runs throughout our lives as we learn to trust and obey him more and more. God is gracious and merciful.

"slow to anger"

God is just and must punish sin. But he is also patient. He often waits to allow us time to believe and turn to him for forgiveness and life. He doesn't owe us this--it's just his nature. God is patient with us.

"abounding in love."

God's not just loving. God IS love. And he is extravagantly generous with it. God is love.

"relents from sending calamity."

When we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and cleanse us from all unrighteousness. (1 John 1:9) He relents when we repent. God relents from judgment when we humble ourselves before him. God relents.

Jonah's confessions remind us a little of what God is like. When you have questions in life, remember who God is and it will go a long way toward helping you answer those questions.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Bye Week Blues (song)

Ok, so my fantasy football league manager wrote a little diddy...and it goes something like this...

An aging blues singer sits down on a stool and picks up a weathered guitar. He strums a few chords, Then in a gravely voice begins to sing "The Bye Week Blues"-- 

Week eight is here, think I could die, 
All my good players now have a bye. 
Got no wide receivers, no running backs, 
No passing game, no rushing attack. 
All them empty spots make a man feel low, 
It’s off to the waiver wire I go. 


I got them bye week blues… 
From the rejects I must chose… 
I just know I’m gonna lose… 
Bye week blues..ohh yeah. 

Wrote that song setting my lineup today. Sigh. 

Nicely done, Steve Hucks.

Monday, September 30, 2013

"Prayer on the Stairs"

I've been reading through Andy Stanley's book Deep and Wide and learned a great way to bring together busy families around God effectively. Andy calls it "Prayer on the Stair."

How it works is simple. At some point each night, Andy calls all the family together and they meet on the stairs. Some are hanging over the bannister, some sitting on the steps. Doesn't matter how--but everyone's there. 

What do they do? They touch base on each other and pray. No devotional material. No planned Bible reading. They simple schedule into the rhythm of their lives a time to stop and pray all together. 

Would more be better? Perhaps. But over the years this time has become so sacred that their kids don't let it go by. When the parents drop the ball, the kids call for prayer on the stair. Perhaps they are striking a chord.

Whatever you do, start. It's easier to redirect something that's already moving. 

Making disciples...together.

Thursday, September 26, 2013

What Unlocks True Freedom?

Jesus said to the people who believed in him, “You are truly my disciples if you remain faithful to my teachings. And you will know the truth, and the truth will set you free.” (John 8:31, 32 NLT)

When people refer to Jesus' words, "And you will know the truth and the truth will set you free", they are often indicating that truth (right knowledge) precedes right action or obedience. Ok, I get that. Truth leads to belief which leads to behavior. Yep. I see that. 

When you read his quote in context, however, there's an interesting order to what is said. Jesus seems to indicate a different order. Maybe even more of a process. Or even a progression. Can you tell that I'm still processing this?

First, Jesus is talking to those who "believed in him." He's been talking to crowds of unbelievers in this chapter. But in the preceding verse it says, "Many...believed in him." So he's talking to believers here. People who have heard the truth he's spoken and responded with faith.

And if they believe, there had to be something to believe. Jesus' words. Truth. Again, right knowledge. So truth preceded their belief. But are they free? Does belief automatically result in freedom? It can, but not necessarily. Think of the Chirst-follower struggling with an addiction. Think of the one who can't seem to stop viewing porn. 

Second,he links truth with obedience. "You are truly my disciples if you REMAIN FAITHFUL TO MY TEACHINGS." (emphasis mine) That is, they show that they are truly his followers by how they follow him (his example and teachings) by living as he did. That's obedience. 

Jesus says, if you follow him in obedience--THEN--you will know the truth and the truth will set you free. Here Jesus seems to say that knowing and understanding truth follows obeying the Truth (the person Jesus). That is, freedom in Christ comes through the on-going obeying and trusting Jesus. It's more than just knowing the right information. It's knowing the right person--the Truth, that is Jesus.  

Admittedly, it's a little like the chicken and the egg. Which comes first: truth or obedience. We sing "Trust and obey" and that is correct. But the Truth that "Sets you free" comes AFTER obedience that is rooted in faith.

So what?

If I want to live free (not just know truth), I need to obey the source of that truth--Jesus Christ. I need to walk with him. I need to follow Jesus' example and teachings by faith.

It starts and ends with a relationship. It grows through obeying the truth that flows from that relationship. Obedience unlocks truth which leads to freedom. That's the elusive fruit for me, it seems. I know the truth. But I don't always know the Truth. (stay in perfect fellowship with Jesus) So I don't always live in freedom. I don't always live out what I believe. So I know the truth but it doesn't set me free because I don't believe it enough to live it out.

So what do I do today? I start with the Truth (Jesus) knowing that he'll lead me to the truth (right thinking) through right behavior (obedience) that sets me free. Join me?

Tuesday, September 24, 2013

A Beautiful Use of Tattoos

I've known Micah Hasty since he was in middle school. He's the real deal. I guess this sort of illustrates that. Anyway, I encourage you to share this like crazy. 

Thursday, September 12, 2013

Listen up! LOL

  • Psalms 81:8 (NLT)

    8“Listen to me, O my people, while I give you stern warnings.O Israel, if you would only listen to me!
  • Psalms 81:11 (NLT)

    11“But no, my people wouldn’t listen.Israel did not want me around.
  • Psalms 81:13 (NLT)

    13Oh, that my people would listen to me!Oh, that Israel would follow me, walking in my paths!

    Listen. Obey. Lead.

    God tells us over and over to listen to his voice or his words to us. We have lots of reasons for not listening too. (time, energy, don't understand, don't know how)

    At the end of the day, we know we need this. So I'm simply going to remind you one way to keep this in front of you: 

    Listen. Spend enough time alone with God that you actually recognize his voice when he speaks to you. Yes, it's written down in the Bible. But he speaks to us through his Spirit. Would you even recognize his voice if he spoke to you right now? This is crucial to walk with God. A relationship isn't lived in silence. There is two-way communication regularly or it will wither and die. 

    Obey. What good is it to listen to a good and great God if you won't listen and obey what he leads you to do. None.

    Lead. You aren't following if you're not leading. Jesus lead others to follow himself. We will do the same if we're following Jesus. This isn't complicated, folks.

    There are many ways and tools out there for you to use to spend time alone with God. You have them on your shelf, most likely. Get a place. Get a plan. Get a partner to hold you accountable. Get started. Listen to God. LOL!

Thursday, September 05, 2013

3-2-1: Prayer-Care-Share (Mission)

updated 10.29.13, 11.18.14

Last week we introduced this memorable target to our church for personal disciple-making:

3-2-1: Prayer-Care-Share

3: Prayer. Pray for 3 people that are far from God but close to 
me. Be specific. Not-yet-believers in particular. They can be close relationally, geographically or, best, both.

2: Care. Compassionately serve people in 2 places as a demonstration of the Gospel.  (Ex. 1 - Inside the church; 2 - Outside the church)

1: Share. Share 1 priority. Follow me as I follow Jesus. It's our 
mission, after all. It's the essence of disciple-making. Sharing the Gospel verbally.

I encourage you to think of yourself as a lighthouse in your school, neighborhood and/or job. Shine there by praying for 3 people, caring in 2 places and sharing 1 priority each week. 

Integrate this into your Home Group experience as you encourage each other to live out this rhythm.

Now...pass it on!

*Note: The Prayer-Care-Share strategy comes from the LighthouseMovement.com and the 3-2-1 comes from the teachings of Neal McGlohon of the Cypress Project and Cypress Network. I have also read of this in GCM Collective training materials.

Thursday, August 29, 2013

3-2-1: Prayer-Care-Share

Am I Making Disciples?

This is a hard thing to measure. We can count offerings and attendance. But how do you count disciple-makers or spiritual growth?

One of the things we've been working on at Grace is how do we measure our success in the areas of spiritual growth that are so hard to measure. We still have a lot of work to do. But I have one scorecard that will help us get started.

3-2-1: Prayer-Care-Share*

I've shared parts of this many times. Here is a "Target" on the wall for us to consider to help us measure how we're doing. 

3: Prayer. Pray for 3 people that are far from God but close to me. Be specific.

2: Care. Serve in 2 places each week. (Ex. 1 - Inside the church; 2 - Outside the church)

1: Share. Share 1 priority. Follow me as I follow Jesus. It's our mission, after all. It's the essence of disciple-making.

I encourage you to think of yourself as a lighthouse in your school, your neighborhood and your job. Shine there by praying for 3 people, caring in 2 places and sharing 1 priority each week. Make this part of your weekly rhythm. Let it be an overflow of who you are in Christ. 

Imagine the light of Christ that will be evident in our communities if we all do this...


*Note: The Prayer-Care-Share strategy comes from the LighthouseMovement.com and the 3-2-1 comes from the teachings of Neal McGlohon of the Cypress Project & Cypress Network.

Monday, August 26, 2013

What's Your Personal Temperament?

I was talking with a friend and he called himself a melancholy. I'd heard the term before but never really given it much thought. I don't usually hear it in casual conversation. So it got my attention. So asked him about it and he told me about the four temperaments and a quick explanation about each one. I found it interesting and wanted to find out what I was. 

He sent me a link and I took the free forty-question temperament test to learn that I was sanguine-choleric. Then I had to Google what that meant. I've included my quick research below for your reading pleasure. After reading the descriptions, I had to agree with the test results. 


There are pros and cons with each of these. Sin can do harm through your personality. The Holy Spirit can redeem your temperaments. Take a few minutes, take the test and then read over the four. It will help you be more self-aware. 

My hope personally is that I will be more aware of my strengths and weaknesses inherent in my personality temperaments. I also hope to be more sympathetic to others who struggle within theirs as they relate to me.

By the way, the four temperaments are sanguine, choleric, phlegmatic and melancholy. Gary Smalley has coined more descriptive terms:

"Gary Smalley has renamed these classifications into a more modern and relatable format based on commonly known animals. These he lists as the "otters" (sanguines), "lions" (cholerics), "golden retrievers" (phlegmatics), and "beavers" (melancholics).[13]"

Thursday, July 18, 2013

How to Read...Books?

You all know that I love to read. I want to do whatever I can to encourage you to read more and more.

Our guest blogger today is Pastor Mike Seaver. He shared this with a handful of pastors in our area. I thought it was extremely valuable and well-written. I hated to see it limited to just us. So here it is! Darien

Hey guys,

I know this may sound random, but I wanted to tell you about a book I’ve been reading.  It is called Lit! by Tony Reinke.  It is actually a book about how to read books.  Sounds boring, right?  Well, it was given to me about 2 years ago and has been on my shelf for that long…but then I saw it the other day and started thumbing through it.  I found that it is excellent.  It is well written and gives a ton of helpful thoughts about how and why we read.

For instance, there will be 28 million books available in English over our lifetime, but we will only have time to read 2600 (if you read a book per week for the next 50 years)…so how do you choose saying “yes” to one book an “no” to a million other books.  This was helpful for me to ponder and to think about what I need to read and not read (as a pastor, husband, father, etc.)

Here are a few of the chapters I found helpful:

· Chapter 3: Reading Is Believing—Savoring Books in an Eye-Candy Culture
· Chapter 5: The Giver’s Voice—Seven Benefits of Reading Non-Christian Books
· Chapter 6: The God Who Slays Dragons—The Purifying Power of Christian Imagination
· Chapter 7: Read with Resolve—Six Priorities that Decide What Books I Read (and Don’t Read)
· Chapter 8: How to Read a Book—20 Tips and Tricks for reading Nonfiction Books
· Chapter 10: Too Busy to Read—Six Ways to Find (and Protect) the Time Your Need to Read Books
· Chapter 11: Driven to Distraction—How Internet Habits Cripple Book Reading
· Chapter 14:  Raising Reader—How Parents and Pastors Can Ignite in Others a Love for Book Reading

Okay, so if you read through these chapter headings and they look lame, don’t get the book…but if they stir you like they did me, it is worth your time!


PS I got this info from Shawn Maze, also a pastor, on how he selects books to read:

"As an aside, currently as a way to determine which books to choose, I have a couple resources:
1. The Well-Educated Mind...  for various literature
2. http://bestcommentaries.com... for the best commentaries

Thanks again for the recommendation.

+ Shawn

P.S. I'm a book nerd and have all my books labeled with Library of Congress numbers and digitally catalogued using Delicious Monster.
If you want help organizing those 2600 books and keeping track of what you let someone "borrow", I can help. :)"

Wednesday, July 03, 2013

An iOS App I Heartily Recommend!

I love this app! I get nothing for recommending it. I just want people to know about it. Download and enjoy! Darien

Glo Bible

The City of God

Jerusalem is one of the most ancient cities in the world, yet it often makes the headlines today. It has been the holy city for Christianity, Judaism and Islam since ancient times. Jerusalem is the only city in the Bible which God calls His own, His dwelling place, His Holy City, as mentioned in Psalms 87, 48, 46 and 47:
He has founded his city on the holy mountain. The Lord loves the gates of Zion more than all the other dwellings of Jacob. Glorious things are said of you, city of God

- Psalm 87:1-3 (NIV)

Great is the Lord, and most worthy of praise, in the city of our God, his holy mountain. Beautiful in its loftiness, the joy of the whole earth, like the heights of Zaphon is Mount Zion, the city of the Great King 
- Psalm 48:1-2 (NIV)
You can explore Jerusalem today, going to the Western Wall, Church of the Holy Sepulcher, Golgotha, Temple Mount, Dome of the Rock and many other key locations. Make sure to read the many captions in the virtual tours in order to understand the context behind these locations.

Virtual Tour: Jerusalem 21st Century Dive into this virtual tour with 30+ explorable hotspots by going to the Media Lens under "Virtual Tours".

Virtual Tour: "Jerusalem 1st Century" Dive into this virtual tour with 30+ explorable hotspots by going to the Media Lens under "Virtual Tours".
You can transition from today's Jerusalem to the 1st Century and explore the holy city in the times of Jesus. You can visit the Temple, Golgotha, Pool of Siloam and many other relevant locations in the Bible.

Glo has over 500 virtual tours of key Biblical sites, such as Capernaum, Jericho, Bethlehem, The Tabernacle, Petra and much more.

By allowing you to explore these Biblical locations through our virtual tours we hope to give you more context and meaning to the Bible passages, making your Bible experience a richer one.

Did you know you have access to these Virtual Tours
in your current app?
Launch Glo and Explore today!

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Tuesday, April 23, 2013

Walking by Faith...Today

So Jesus explained,  “I tell you the truth, the Son can do nothing by himself. He does only what he sees the Father doing. Whatever the Father does, the Son also does. John 5:19 NLT

Jesus makes a startling statement here.
He says that he can do "Nothing by himself." Nothing? Really? I mean, this is Jesus we're talking about here, right? And yet, that's exactly what he says.

What does he mean? Well, I think he means that he doesn't want to do anything except what he sees his Father doing. He only wants to busy himself doing what his Father is doing. He wants to move with his Father as if they are one (funny, I mean they are one. Wait...oh).

In other words, it's so important to Jesus to do what he sees his Father doing that he "Can't" imagine doing anything else with his precious time. After all, he only lived about 35 years. And he only ministered publicly about 3 years. So he didn't have time to waste saving the world, right? That's not much time to save the world.

What about me? Do I have time to waste? Based on what you see me doing day in an day out, you might conclude that I have lots of time to waste. But I don't.

So how do I decide what to do with my time? How do I simplify and prioritize my day? I limit myself to only do what I see my Father doing. If he's not in it, I move on to something else. If I'm having trouble discerning, I need to stop and pray. I need to unstop my ears and listen to my Father for further direction. I may even need to confess sin and ask Father to fill me with his Spirit.

How different would my day look if I actually lived this way? Walking by faith moment by moment listening and acting.

Yes, I'd still be responsible for my family. But my Father already knows about them. Sure I'd need to take breaks to rest. But then that's his idea by design. I'd need to eat but he might prompt me to skip a meal here and there. And that would be okay, wouldn't it.

Father, I confess that too often I rush into my day without really listening to you. And as I go through my day, I confess that I often don't listen expecting you to direct me. As a result, I busy myself doing a lot of things that just don't matter as much as I think they do. I repent of such a presumptuous and arrogant posture. I repent of such foolish behavior!

Lord, transform my thinking about my schedule, my calendar, my To-Do list and my day. Cleanse me from such wicked sin. Forgive me for not walking by faith as if you weren't trustworthy.

I want to walk with you today. I begin now. Holding my daily agenda loosely, I move forward with fear and trembling because I so don't want to disappoint you. I want to really LIVE today! By your grace...I will. In Jesus' name I pray, amen.

Saturday, April 20, 2013

A Dangerous Question

Sometimes I would like to ask God why He allows poverty, suffering, and injustice when He could do something about it. But, I'm afraid He would ask me the same question. 

- Anonymous

Friday, April 05, 2013

VIP Funny

Billy Graham was returning to Charlotte after a speaking engagement and when his plane arrived there was a limousine there to transport him to his home.

As he prepared to get into the limo, he stopped and spoke to the driver. "You know," he said, "I'm 87 years old and I have never driven a limousine. Would you mind if I drove it for a while?"

The driver said, "No problem. Have at it."

Billy gets into the driver's seat and they head off down the highway. A short distance away sat a rookie State Trooper operating his first speed trap. The long black limo went by him doing 70 in a 55 mph zone. The trooper pulled out and easily caught the limo. He then got out of his patrol car to begin the procedure.

The young trooper walked up to the driver's door and when the glass was rolled down. He was surprised to see who was driving. He immediately excused himself and went back to his car and called his supervisor.

"I know we are supposed to enforce the law...but I also know that important people are given certain courtesies. I need to know what I should do because I have stopped a very important person."

The supervisor asked, "Is it the governor?"

The young trooper said, "No, he's more important than that."

The supervisor said, "Oh, so it's the president."

The young trooper said, "No, he's even more important than that."

After a moment, the supervisor finally asked, "Well then, who is it?"

The young trooper said, "I think it's Jesus, because he's got Billy Graham for a chauffeur!"